The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare Review: "A little too low stakes"

There are few things as seductive and amusing in a film as the fall of the Nazi regime, and Hollywood will likely continue to find new ways to entertain with said story time and time again. Guy Ritchie’s latest flick, The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare, follows this formula, zeroin in on one specific battle we’ve never seen dramatized before. 

The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare is based on the true story of Operation Postmaster, a rogue mission backed by British Prime Minister Winston Churchill that sent the off-books Small Scale Raiding Force to seize three Axis ships anchored at Fernando Po. War historian Damien Lewis penned The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare: How Churchill’s Secret Warriors Set Europe Ablaze and Gave Birth to Modern Black Ops on the topic in 2016, which serves as the basis for Ritchie’s adaptation.

Henry Cavill puts a boisterous, charismatic spin on SSRF leader Major Gus March-Phillips, who agrees on the condition that he gets a team of his choosing. He plucks bloodthirsty Danish marksman Anders Lassen (scene-stealer Alan Ritchson), master planner Geoffrey Appleyard (Alex Pettyfer), sailing expert Henry Hayes (Hero Fiennes Tiffin), and Freddy Alvarez (Henry Golding), a diver and explosives expert who’s “in terrible misery unless he’s destroying something.” Each member of the motley crew has a brushed-over reason to hate the Nazis. For Major March-Phillips, who’s got a penchant for a smart coat, it’s “not because they’re Nazis, but because they’re gauche.”

There aren’t any real spoilers to be given; the film is almost too straightforward. While fight sequences are fun to watch, they’re also predictable overall. Speeches read more like the start of a paintball match more so than a wartime raid, with March-Phillips reminding the bunch to “try to have fun.” The Nazi soldiers are little else but bumbling idiots, save for Fernando Po’s sadistic and seemingly witty honcho Heinrich Luhr, who banters primarily in German riddles with undercover Jewish actress-turned-spy Marjorie Stewart (portrayed by the captivating Eiza González). But even then, he’s just dumb enough to assume the position of Party City Julius Caesar to Stewart’s Cleopatra on the night of the raid. 

González puts on a delightful performance as the quick-witted Stewart, whose character additionally serves as a canvas for some exquisite period styling. Still, costuming, visually stunning blood shots, and dynamic sound design choices - as in the lighter scene between Luhr and Stewart - don’t save the film from its triteness. Pivots to first-person shooter perspective keep the action rollicking, but Ministry could’ve perhaps benefitted from a little more tension and drama: even when Stewart slips up in Yiddish, or Heron’s (Babs Olusanmokun) gun fails to cock, you never honestly feel like they’re in real trouble. And ultimately, the sheer absurdity of a five-man ragtag crew taking down hundreds of Nazis with ease (and an aptly placed axe) made the risky heist look a little too low stakes.

It’s loud in that Jerry Bruckheimer way, with the deadpan British snark you always get out of Ritchie ventures. But as a work of art, it’s largely a half-baked pastiche of Inglorious Basterds’ comical ultra-violence, trading Nazi scalps for still-beating Nazi hearts. Still despite where it falls short, Guy Ritchie’s jaunty retelling of Operation Postmaster is a good time. After all, it rings true that we will always have fun watching the Nazis get wrecked. 

The Ministry of Ungentlemanly Warfare is out now in the USA, and will be available in the UK and other select markets on Prime Video this summer.

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